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Title: Where My Heart Belongs
Author: obi's girl
Summary: Separately - Obi & Ami think about what they mean to each other and the growing love between them; Obi is on Coruscant and Ami on Naboo.
Romance: Obi/Ami
Rating: PG-13 Romance
Disclaimer: The characters of Obi-Wan Kenobi and Queen Amidala don't belong to me but the almighty - George Lucas. The idea for this story is like Sleepless in Seattle - except in space. The poem "Where My Heart Belongs" is my original work.
Spoiler: Oh Yes. Episode 2 or 3, depending on what you think!

Obi-Wan's P.O.V
"Where My Heart Belongs"

Our lives aren't what we know
Fate has already been spun
Yours and mine

You with Anakin
And I...
I don't know -
Only the Force

The Jedi walked onto the balcony as the sun set. He and his Padawan recently arrived from a mission. Obi-Wan had been in with the Jedi Council for about four hours and he was tired. When they reached the Temple, Obi-Wan immediately relieved Anakin - telling him he could return to their quarters to rest. Anakin, a nineteen-year-old, had a lot of energy but the mission they were on was very tiring. Everywhere they went, the Jedi were either yelled at or patronized by a mob or had their ship hijacked. Speaking to the Council about the events of the mission was an annoyance to Obi-Wan. He had patience before (when Qui-Gon was alive) but now he was the Master, he was beginning to lose it.

In the past, he never had to worry about love. His life was dedicated to the Jedi and to his Master, Qui-Gon Jinn. His studies and training never prepared him for falling in love with someone who couldn't love him back. In the Jedi Code, there is no emotion, only peace. He recited that line in his head several times, a constant reminder what he felt could never be.

Where My Heart Belongs Cont.
Obi-Wan's P.O.V

My love,
Your willingness
Smashed us together

I sit here and cry,
Praying for the future
And
What might never be

But I still love you

Fate is a tangle
I cannot stop the Sands of Time

I love you,
My sweet handmaiden
I just wish...

He stretched his aching arms, reaching out for an unknown vision - the vision of the woman he loved, Queen Amidala.

Over the past few years, his friendship and admiration of her turned into something greater and almost deadly. He fell in love with her - the woman his Padawan loved since he was nine. His heart belonged to her regardless of Anakin's attachment to her. Amidala was who she was - a simple woman, almost.

First, she was the elected Queen of Naboo, lived life as the handmaiden Padme Nebarrie to escape politics, then she ran for the Senate - a position she filled with great pride. But because of her Senate responsibilities, it rarely allowed her to leave Senate building to see either Anakin or himself. And because of that, she resigned and moved back to Naboo. If she couldn't have a private life without having to deal with power-hungry senators than she wouldn't be one either.

However, before leaving she made an appointment to see him at the Temple. She didn't call - just showed up and hugged him caringly. Anakin was in class, so they were alone for the afternoon.

They walked in the gardens, in and around the Temple for hours. He didn't even realize it was dark until she pointed it out to him and that Anakin was probably home. Obi-Wan hesitated a moment before answering. Anakin. He was like a son to him for so long and being with this woman, talking with her - he began to feel something deeper for her than he ever felt before. He stared at her. Amidala froze as he watched her.

It was getting cold. She pulled her robe closer around her waist but Obi-Wan scooted over, offering his. She took it graciously, placing it over her shoulders. Amidala pushed back her flowing hair, finally placing it on her left shoulder. The stare continued for awhile until Obi-Wan tipped her chin, kissing her lightly on the lips.

Amidala pulled back, unsure how to act. Her heart belonged to Anakin but Obi-Wan was something different. She stood up, giving him back his robe, curtsied and disappeared without say a word. Tears filled his eyes - tears of regret and of a love that could never be.

That was about eight months ago, but even so it felt like an eternity. He loved Amidala and being with her, even just talking to her, made him uneasy. He knew it was a mistake to kiss her but how could he resist? Amidala wasn't a fourteen year-old anymore. She was a grown woman, a blossomed flower, he was just beginning to recognize.

Now, he gazed again at the sun. It was the end of another day and Obi-Wan peered at the sky, searching for the star Amidala belonged to.

Amidala P.O.V

After hearing "the daily schedule" from Captain Panaka, Amidala dismissed all her handmaidens - an action the Captain would have frowned against but she warned them not to tell him about it. The girls' nodded their heads obediently and left her highness alone.

Yes, after the people of Naboo heard she resigned they immediately dropped the older monarch and reelected her as their leader. Amidala hesitated at first to accept the honor but after prompting from Palpitine and her former handmaiden's urging her to come back - she accepted.

Her coronation went on without a problem, except seeing Obi-Wan with Anakin. She tried not to show it but after the kiss they shared on Coruscant in the gardens, it was hard to ignore what her real feelings for him were. In that kiss, in that one moment, she felt alive. Though she couldn't read his mind, his kiss spoke volumes about the way he felt about her. And Anakin. He was pleased to see her again and as Queen. He was so happy he hardly even noticed something bother her but Obi-Wan did.

It was only a Coronation but to her, it almost felt like she was getting married. She was no longer allowed to feel. She couldn't look at him. If she did, she feared she might break down and cry on the spot because she couldn't take the guilt.

Amidala loved Anakin or did she? She loved Obi-Wan too. The kiss. It stirred up old feelings, old feelings she thought were dead. Obi-Wan had always been special to her. In her youth, she had the biggest crush on him - a crush that turned into love over night. She stepped up to the alter. The royal priest began to coronation, going through a long speech about reigning properly, thinking about the people and leading with the utmost certainty and statute. It was enough to draw her emotions elsewhere - to Obi-Wan's heart.

From the minute she appeared at his apartment, her world swirled from one of total bliss with Anakin to second-guessing her loyalties. Truth was, she wanted to stay and kiss him some more but was scared to. Obi-Wan was sweet, caring, truthful - all the things she always wanted except being Anakin's Master. That's what scared her off - her fear Anakin would find out about the kiss and leave Obi-Wan and maybe her.

Amidala opened her eyes, remembering the day. Her eyes fluttered, thinking of the event. Afterwards, she was able to speak with Obi-Wan but only briefly. They talked by the water fountain, away from the guests and away from Anakin. It was quiet at first. They didn't know what to say to each other. Finally, Obi-Wan spoke.

He smiled at her, "Amidala, I'm sorry about what happened between us on Coruscant. I shouldn't have tried to kiss you. I'm sorry. I know I went over the line..." before he could say more, Amidala pressed her lips against his. Obi-Wan took the embrace, kissing her back with equal force.

Obi-Wan drew back a bit, brushing her bangs away. Her lips were numb. He smiled, caressing her cheek finally whispering what he had been dying to tell her for so long, "I love you,"

Amidala shook her head, remembering his words. He was so sweet. He loved her more than the universe and yet he couldn't. There were circumstances between them. 1) the most important - Anakin Skywalker. She was his Angel. After she met him in Watto's junk shop, her life was forever changed. But now she no longer had to worry about his feelings, but Obi-Wan's as well. Oh, but that kiss. No matter what happened, she couldn't let him go. She couldn't.

Her heart belonged to him though Anakin had deep feelings for her. Amidala composed herself as she felt a single tear form down her flushed cheeks. The droplet fell onto her desk. She wiped her face, trying to hold back the flow of tears. She fell onto her chair, crying immensely. <Oh Force. I love you Obi-Wan Kenobi. My Heart belongs to you and always will,>

Obi-Wan's P.O.V

Obi-Wan dropped onto his couch after entering the apartment he shared with Anakin. The boy had been there earlier. He dropped a note on the counter saying he was with friends. He didn't see it or probably did but discarded it. After the Council gave him 'the okay' he left without a thought, heading straight for his quarters. He was exhausted. The Jedi closed his eyes, letting his mind wander off into space. He needed to relax. So much was going on. Obi-Wan reached far as far as Naboo and finding himself inside the Palace of Theed. His spirit wandered down the hallway, finally finding Amidala's quarters.

Her face was wet from tears which were still coming. It pained him to see her in such turmoil. Suddenly dawned on him why she was crying. Her heart. Her heart was in pain the same way his was. <Amidala. No,> he cried, trying to reach out. He didn't want her to feel the anguish and false hope of what could never be. He didn't want her to hurt. It was too much pain. She sudennly stood up, wiping away the last of her tears as if she felt he was there beside her. Obi-Wan frowned.

Obi-Wan's P.O.V
Where My Heart Belongs Cont.

My sweet Queen,
The handmaiden that stole my heart
As much as I want you -
Want to be with you
I cannot
And fear
We may never be

Never be
Our hearts belong to each other
But it must be kept secret
I love you

My Heart belongs to you
It belongs in your safe hands

I can never deny
My feelings run deep
But I must resist -
We both have to

It's safe -
Safe from harm
and
from each other

I love you
I must deny -
We must deny;
We cannot, never be
This lost soul is yours

The Queen gazed out the window, trying to hold back another round of hurtful tears. It worked. Her face hardened, allowing her Queen facade to take over. Being Amidala made her stronger. Being Padme, a simple handmaiden allowed her to be free but it also allowed her to be weak and a loss to her feelings. Obi-Wan nodded, slowly leaving her alone.

<Obi-Wan, you swept into my life like a savage storm, somewhat peaceful. Now you torment my soul, my entire being. Your kiss, your touch drives me crazy. > She paused, <I can't stop how you make me feel. You brought life into my monotone existence. My heart belongs to you. You safeguard it with yours like a secret treasure. I can never hurt you. I can't loose your love, your friendship. >

Her thoughts ceased a moment, allowing bracing herself. "I love you,"

Amidala's P.O.V
Where My Heart Belongs Cont.

How can I forget you?
You're soft embrace
I let you in without
A thought

And now I must forget you
Though I don't want to

My heart will always,
Always
Belong to you

But regretfully,
I must follow my fate

It cannot be with you
Anakin is mine

Obi-Wan's P.O.V

He sat alone, alone in the dark - safe from hurting. He drew back. Obi-Wan couldn't stand to see her hurt, so he left. He withdrew himself from feeling her. It was the only thing he could do to stop feeling the agony of a silent defeat.

Amidala's P.O.V.

I sit here and cry,
Praying for the future
And
What might never be?

I can't stop this feeling
I love you

<How can I say goodbye to you, Obi-Wan? How can I let you out of my mind, out of my heart? > her thoughts ceased, fixated on something, <You were always the one, always you. It was never - Force help me - what I felt for Anakin wasn't love. It was love, just not the love I feel for you. It was the love a sister feels for her little brother. My heart belongs to you. I can't let go. I can't let go of you, >

Where My Heart Belongs Cont.

The Force brought us together
I see that now

I don't wish to lose him,
Nor you

But your love,
My willingness
Smashed us together

Obi-Wan's P.O.V

<I can't just let you go. I've watched you grow, watched you learn - you stumble sometimes but that's natural. I falter when I can't feel you and it hurts. It will always hurt but I must let go. > he paused, reading his hands, <We were placed in this universe for a reason, a story unknown to us. I will always love you. Always. Never forget that, >

Obi-Wan & Amidala P.O.V
Where My Heart Belongs Cont.

We must be strong
Ours lives are not our own
But our Hearts are

We must forget,
But we must not forget
What we mean to each other

I love you (Amidala)
I love you, my Queen (Obi-Wan)

My Heart will always lay with you (Obi-Wan)
I cannot forget (Amidala)
Refuse to forget (Obi-Wan)

Things will never be (Amidala)
We cannot stop Time (Obi-Wan)

We must leave each other
And
Crawl back into our shells,
Our desolate shells -
The shells that kept us from feeling
For so long

Never be (Amidala)
Never be (Obi-Wan)

But I still love you,
Always will
(Obi-Wan)

We must separate ourselves
It's the only way we can...
Forget

But I still love you (Amidala)
I still love you (Obi-Wan)

My sweet handmaiden (Obi-Wan)
My Beloved Jedi Master (Amidala)

The End

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